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My 4 year old is gifted, no question about it (he already knows his multiplication tables). He may be on the autism spectrum, have ADHD and/or sensory issues (hard to tease this out of typical 4-year-old behavior). But my question is less about that and more about how to make sure we don’t end up in information silos. In an effort to learn more about my son’s giftedness and neuro-difference, I joined Facebook groups called “Twice Special” (2e) and found a counselor who helped connect gifted students and families with resources. We took him to a small preschool that only accepts gifted students and plans to keep him until 1st grade. At first this felt very useful. Look at all these people whose kids are having issues just like me! They have already released some of the best providers/reviewers in the area!
Lately, though, I’ve started to worry. Since all these parents seem to be running in the same circles and looking at the same providers, there is a real danger of pseudoscience creeping in and taking hold.
Thankfully, these people are not anti-vax (that I’ve seen), but there are many rumors about primitive reflexes, auditory processing disorder, school refusal (as a disorder), oppositional defiant disorder, etc. Many believe that homeschooling and schooling is the only situation that works for 2e students. How do I know what things are (perhaps not well-known or dismissed in the public) that have not been proven in a particular society? I’ve tried doing some “research of my own” online, but anything with any sort of research behind it has legit-looking websites and vocal supporters. Help!
– Gifted and needy
Dear gifted and needy,
Keep the focus on your individual child and what you think he needs. That may not always be what the “average,” “typically developing” child needs, or what a particular parenting community has determined. theirs They need children. As you say, the behaviors you’re looking at now may be early signs of a diagnosis that could benefit from specific interventions — or they may be things about a little person still growing on their developmental curve. You should continue to see how it is yours The child develops, his needs and strengths and coping mechanisms, etc.
Four is really too young for you to know in what environments and under what conditions your child can learn. I was like, “My son can only be homeschooled!” I think it is too early to make such clear statements. There is great variation in how schools approach and support children with learning disabilities. Once a specific label (“2E”) has been applied to your child, avoid the temptation to become rigid in your thinking, believing that there is a one-size-fits-all or correct approach – educational or otherwise.
Community was very important to me as a parent of neurodivergent children. But I am very wary of those who seem to have little investment in the idea that there is justice. one “Right” area or one A unique approach to enabling children with special needs to thrive. Remember that the loudest people in the group are not always right and their children are not yours. No one knows your child like you do. Focus on getting to know and understand your child and how he learns to the best of your ability, and continue to discuss with trusted health care providers, therapists, teachers, etc. how to meet his needs and support his healthy development.
– Nicole
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